The great goal of Deciding Better is to escape the trap of fear, uncertainty and control.
Decision making is hard when the outcome is uncertain. What’s so bad about a little doubt? Joined to uncertainty are two interacting factors: Fear and Control.
Uncertainty provokes anxiety. When we don’t know how things will turn out, the emotion of fear comes into play. It gets us ready for fight or flight. This is anxiety, a neurochemically induced cognitive state. It’s a deep seated brain mechanism with great adaptive utility. A little fear can be a very good thing at the right time.
The problem is that we experience this fear constantly. Then we call it stress and anxiety. Our big brains help us see how uncertain the world really is. I talked about it the other day in a discussion of what makes decisions hard. Decisions aren’t only hard, they provoke fear because of the associated uncertainty.
So what’s scary about uncertainty? Ultimately, its having to face a loss of control. When we’re masters of our environment and in control, we know what to expect. Lose that certainty and we lose control. Causing anxiety and stress.
Deciding better must include embracing uncertainty without engaging the other two sides of this triangle of fear and control. At least not any more than necessary.
The more we understand about the world and its complexity, the more profound our appreciation of how unpredictable the world really is. We are never really in control of outcomes and we are truly powerless to bend the world to our will. We can powerfully influence the world through our actions, but we can’t control anything other than how we choose to act in the moment.
I believe this is at the core of why what Stephen Covey called the world’s “wisdom literature” emphasizes humility and releasing the illusion that we’re in control of the future. At the same time, Covey started with his First Habit, “Be Proactive” as a step in controlling ourselves rather than controlling the world.